They decide to meet up in Cape Town, because of its equidistance between Sydney and Reykjavik only later does Elva worry about the city's infamously high rates of sexual violence. Over eight years of email correspondence – initiated by Elva – she has "put the blame where it belonged firmly and unapologetically" and Stranger has received it "wholeheartedly and unwaveringly", but despite the "healing miracles" that have occurred through this exchange, she believes that "closure" can only happen in person. Others would want any re-connection to happen alongside a cop ready to step up and arrest the bastard.įor Elva, a well-known writer and violence-prevention activist in her native Iceland, though, spending time with her rapist is the only way forward. Some might consider the delivery of a hard kick to the groin the only possible reason to seek the perpetrator out. This unusual, courageous attempt at rapprochement is documented in South of Forgiveness, which is written by both.įor many survivors of sexual violence, the thought of seeing their attacker again, let alone spending a week talking to him, would cause great distress. Seventeen years later the two arrange to meet in South Africa with "the intention of reaching forgiveness, once and for all". In December 1996, 18-year-old Australian student Tom Stranger raped his 16-year-old girlfriend, Thordis Elva, in her Reykjavik bedroom.
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